I wrote this post a few weeks ago, when I was in a quite irritated state. I had left it in draft as I realised that I was in a very grumpy mood, but today I thought I would put it out there anyways. I realise that it sounds a bit harsh, but well, what do you think? I will leave you with the rant, but understand if you don’t finish reading it :).
Since I moved to the new place we have been getting around 1 visitor a month: Michael’s parents and John in October, my my mum and sister in November, Jan and Kirsti in December, and so far this year Adrian, Julian and Christabelle, Karen, and Marilyn and Christabelle then in March, (repeating last year’s visit…weee!), Stephen and Michele etc. But what have I realised from these visits?
Well, first of all I have realised that I am not the most tolerant person maybe, or the best host O:). Michael more than surpasses me in all of these: he makes sure we have a variety of breakfast stuff for all, and that everyone really enjoys themselves, and does not get irritated by anything it seems. I, on the other hand, am quite the opposite: Before Michael people would find in the fridge whatever I would have normally, and when people don’t act the way I expect, I get quite grumpy and irritated. I expect things to happen in a certain way and people to act in a certain way especially in our house, but it seems like my expectations are different to what others expect (even discussing with Michael I can see that while I expect certain things he expects quite different for the same activity).
I thought that having just had so many visits and none in the near future I can think of, this would be the opportune moment to write something about what I think about having visitors, so that hopefully no one thinks I am referring to anyone (which normally I am not, or referring to too many :P), or get scared because they are the ones coming next :P.
So what do I expect?
If you have some idea about what you want to do, let me know! I am horrible at decision-making so some help in that area would be HIGHLY appreciated! If you ask me to suggest something and you don’t like what I suggest just say it! I have probably already been there anyway so would be happy to see anything else you are interested in. Once we are doing something however I expect some enthusiasm! It is not nice to show people around when they look down their nose at stuff: you are in a different country now, be in Malta or London, and some respect as to the differences and foibles of a different culture would be appreciated!
Another thing that seems to irritate me is the way people act at home. First of all remember that we do not live alone but live with other people: using or taking our stuff without asking may be acceptable but I draw the line at anyone using their stuff or eating their food – I wouldn’t like it if you even think about it let alone do it!! I don’t think that I do that to them, so I don’t expect a guest to do that.
Second of all remember that you are a guest. I expect people to follow the general norms that exist in our house and the way we live. Some help around the house would also be highly appreciated…and NO…I don’t want to spend all the time washing up after you (if we say no as there are too many people, then you are not obliged :P). I don’t expect you to vacuum the house or anything drastic like that! But some help in washing/drying plates or chopping stuff if we’re cooking and there is space in the kitchen IS appreciated. Don’t expect this all the time you are there, but helping out once to show your appreciation is appreciated.
All this might sound like I don’t like people visiting me…which is definitely not true. However, as all these people are passing through I sometimes get highly irritated with a visitor which could easily be rectified if some consideration to others is given. I AM getting more tolerant, so that maybe people who will come later will see a less irritated Ann :P..but I don’t promise anything :D.
Do you think I am being intolerant and inconsiderate? If so let me know…what do you know? I might see your point and relax a bit more :D.